Sat 29 Nov 08:
work till 8pm... then called baby but he didn't pick up so i went shop around alone... after awhile he called me... and we changed some money to play with the plushie machine... WTH 1st time couldn't get any stitch.. then we head forward to MS for our movie... then we went to another plushie machine.. 1st time spend near to $100 got nothing... what the ^*(@&(*!& Baby spent alot just wanna get the cute stitch which will walk around.... but still couldn't too hard man! sob! sorry for wasting so much money... After the movie and the fun we head back to suntec as i wanna withdraw money... and he park his car there... then he bring me to chomchom and hav our supper... Then he sent me home~

Still i didn't bath and sleep straight away.. i rushed my xmas cards! at lease now i got 3 designs...
so long didn't post any photo i shall do soon! 11/30/2008 04:09:00 PM

i over slept but still able to make it on time to work.. all thanks to baby.. He speed and try his best to get me to work on time.. i guess he's more alert towards me.. While sitting in his car, i hav so many things in mind until i also dunno wad i'm thinking... Suddenly he hold me hand... Aww so sweet!!~ When i reached my work place, my colleague passed me something... it's a present from jin.. he brought THE STITCH JIZSAW!! after my work, i text him to thanks him also scolded him for spending money on me~ i like being pamper but is from the person i love... so dear friends pls dun spend anything on me cos i'll feel guilty!



I really feel that i hav problem in my brain.... yet i'm scare of going for a check up.. wad if really is a brain cancer? my headache is driving me nuts! Always after headache, i couldn't see anything for a few min.. i dunno why my depression is back... mayb is the stress i'm having~ 11/28/2008 11:30:00 PM

wed 26 Nov 08:
After knowing wad've i done when i'm in dead drunk, i couldn't get to slp.. keep on laughing at my stupidity and feels so guilty towards my friends.... It really bother me.. As i dunno why i drank that much and did those things that i didn't know any shits! URG!

after work i went to orchard and waited for my prince.. waited him for 4hrs plus i wasn't feeling well~ i gave up and went to take mrt when it reached 10pm.. as it's weekdays so no midnight movie.... i went to took mrt with tears & disappointment... Off my phone and everything but still on it and contact him~ Met him at ps and he took me around... driving me around just to cheer me up and wanna bring me to some romantic places for supper, it's a pity that all shop was close at those hrs... while looking for place, i told him to whole story after we broke off.. i've got depression etc.... wad really happened to me and how i pick up on drinking...
so we went to the old place he used to bring me there for porridge and send me home...

i wants and will be your gd and silly girl again! sorry for everything~

Thu 27 Nov 08:
i dun understand why i keep having bad headache after that headache, i couldn't see anything.. i wasn't able to see anything, i see everything white... i suspect i hav a tumor in my brain! hahhah~ perhaps i watched too much movie? But if is real, i dunno how to accept.. So i decided to ignore this matter.... this happened when i'm still working... and everyone left... i dunno wad's wrong with the youngers nowadays.. many excuses for not working... or left without letting others know... No choice i gotta do everything by myself again =( 11/27/2008 07:25:00 PM

Tue 25 Nov 08:
i almost can;t get up for work... Lucky got jin to give me morning call.. Else i think my boss gonna kill me!! When i woke up, was having bad hang over... i drank water and puked out... wadever i ate also puke.... and so i took half day off and get myself to hav some rest... But i still went to work with the hang over.. where ever i walk is all spinning... But i nv regret drinking and chilling out with them... I'M HAPPY! yes i am! and i love & missed my girls~ =D

*i dun feel like staying at home~ i dun wish my mom and sis to know too much things abt me... i wanna b that quiet like in the past cos i feel that the closest we are the more easy to hurts each other... less contact less conflict... body language, the way we speak is the easiest to get any conflict.. Furthermore mom now knows i'm a drinker keep on nagging at me... i just wanna be happy is that so hard?!

Mon 24 Nov 08:
After work i received a call from nicole, and we gonna meet up~ for chilling... It my 2nd time i got knock out after drinking! i dunno the story behind when i'm drunk... i've drank 2 erdinger, and the shot... And was dead drunk~ lucky got those girls and nicole's guy friend help out... Another very sweet guy who drove me timbre when i lost my way there... then he & Rio joined us in drinking for a cup, and went to meet their friends after that.... After i was drunk he's back to timbre and fetch me home... i heard that he carry me home! I wish at that moment i'm sober cos i missed the feeling when i'm in his arms... Missed the feeling he care and protect me like his only precious girl~ But unlucky me was drunk in deep shit! i wish i know the story when i'm drunk~ sorry babes and hunks for the trouble... thx to hav guys around~ =D too happy to be with my pretty babes! But really got to restrict myself in drinking larrr~

*didn't took any pictire with my pretty babes~~ =( hope next time we'll meet again for drinking and i wont get drunk~ I'm so ps lo!! sob~ 11/25/2008 09:07:00 PM

it's 4am now and i'm msning with him~ i've got his msg and ans..... i understand your stand...~ i'll accept and heal... i think i need sometime to heal.... right now my eyes is filled with tears, heart is filled with hurts.... i dunno shd i b happy or upset.... our relationship start from friends... but wad u said r right! we need to do this.. i also dun wanna patch and break anymore!!

I'LL HEAL,
I'LL BE THAT SILLYGIRL OF YOURS AGAIN!
I'LL WAIT FOR MY SILLYBOY~~~~~~~~~

I WANNA SETTER DOWN WITH EUUU......................................... 11/23/2008 04:01:00 AM

i'm sick!!! my fever was on and off... giving me bad headache! I'm shivering, and feel like vomiting whole day, everyday~ After work, went for movie.. finally i watched the coffin~ It's a messy story larrr! I've been taking panadol for days.... hahaha~ Mom keep on nagging me for getting sick and didn't take care of myself!

I'm craving for alcohol again how? URG!~~ i'm sick yet i'm a alcoholic & workaholic!!!! i dunno wad to do with myself... i can't ask anyone out for drinking and i wanna cut down on drinking, cos it's expensive!! as got loads of things i wanna get for myself... Like ipod, laptop, body cream, facial stuff, pajamas, xmas present, gucci wallet and loads and loads of things... Most imptly is SAVE money! 11/23/2008 12:30:00 AM

Fri 21 Nov 08:
Today my boss was kinda pissed off... cos i smsed her i'm going to see a doc... so will be there around 11.30am... when i reached there saw her with some black face... so i just kept quiet the whole day... She can't blame me right? i sick didn't even get a off and rest when she really need help.. i endure for 1 week already still didn't get any off, just get a few hrs off to see a doc also can't?
Then the sales was so gd that she able to smile and laugh... and start talking to me again... And told me how angry she was in the morning cos she worried that i won't be here blah blah blah and the cashier girl who supposed to come today went MIA... My boss could reach her... SO WAD?! can throw trumpet on me? I USED MY LIFE TO WORK FOR YOU LIKE A BULL OKAY!! If she really unhappy with me the most i quit lorrr~ NOT A BIG DEAL!! When the work load is so heavy! Cashier, restock, making salad, wash the dishes & utensils, clean the fridge.. i can say everything there need me to do! Furthermore i'm just waiting to work in pub next year~ But sweet things is after that she asked the picalo to help me... with washing and cleaning and she herself stayed till 5pm and help me with washing and everything... and let me go off at 7pm... she even said on mon onwards, i can ask the picalo the help me in anything and ask her start work from 10am and i can dismiss her anytime... lighten my work load~

Nonsense came suddenly at around 4pm++ he stayed and wait for me till i finished my work... Help me throw the rubbish, buy me lunch, accompany me hav my dinner and escort me home~ He tot i'm gonna be alone again.... Wanted to help me with washing or anything he could help... How sweet huh? thx nonsense!! i know you cares abt me... really appreciate it~ But my heart still unable to replace~ Hope the promises and the words u told me is real! someday if i'm old and sick, no one wans me you will adopt me as ur pet and look after me hor?! hahahhaha~ i wan to hav abalone 3 times a day and live in the condo!! =x so work hard strike hard horrr!

Thu 20 Nov 08:
i worked till cried... cos i'm sick, plus damn freaking giddy and having the stupid lady's problem! yet still hav to work... worst part is got loads of work to be done all by myself, alone... No one able to help me... i really almost fainted for afew time.. glad that there's some table of wad to let me grab on... Kinda pissed off!!! As i HAVE to rush home and REACH home by 8pm and continue working.. this is soem part of my religion stuff... And my boss came back at 7pm.. WTF! within the 3 hrs, i was working alone, can't even go to the restroom... ~ URG! 11/21/2008 11:22:00 PM

i'm still sick yet still got to work.... almost fainted ytd & today.. and today i'm totally black out twice... i really dunno when i will collaps...recently i dunno why keep flashing back those memories... make me feel like crying... and i did cried today while drinking~~ even now...he may know everything abt me... but me? i know notthing abt him! i'm like nobody towards him... A STRANGERRR!!!! somehow missed him!! SHITT MAN! i hate this feelings.... it's freaking miserable.... but wad else can i do? is the path i choose..... i used work to numb myself... hopefully i can collaps asap... and leave forever~ i know behind my back this few days, i'm sure he went to pub/bar/club!

when i look in the mirror... i saw a girl in the mirror and she's freaking UGLY!!!
why does love turns into grief?
why does sweet memories turn into painful memories?
Why does painful memories can hardly earse?
Why it just stay in your heart forever?
like a uneraseable stain?

Count down to the day i'm gonna collaps!!!! 11/19/2008 11:54:00 PM

couldn't get up on time for work... so i went to work at 11am.. but still went home at 6.30pm~~ hahah!! Got a VIP came to visit me today.... not only that... she waited for me and went home with me... YESHHH!!! MY BELOVED MAMA!! MUACKS!! i wanna faster work alot and get myself a laptop and save back the money i've spend..... URG!! save save save!!!

我感动天 感动地 怎么感动不了你 明知道没有结局 却还死心塌地 总相信爱情会有奇迹 都是我骗自己 11/18/2008 10:46:00 PM

i'm sick yet i'm still went to work... ahhh! i'm a workaholic no choice ahahahah~
Erm~ i'm still waiting for someone answer~ Though i know his answer already... CFM is negative answer~~ only can blame on myself yay! Hmm~ i wanna go chill T.T
Finally, i finish 1 design of my xmas card! BUT i can't show here else everyone knows my design already! coming out the 2nd design soon! This yr xmas card, i will use printer to print than draw 1 by 1 and color 1 by 1... NO TIME LARRR!!! But still the cards is still designed by Shiori© 11/18/2008 01:37:00 AM

Sat 15Nov08:
After work, met tracy and joan... had dinner @ pastamania... Then shop around at Cine... Tracy larr dun wanna wtach movie... so we went to chill @ Balcony Bar.... We ordered Zombie for me, japanese slipper for Joan and Watermelon Strawberry for Tracy~ Also drank Heineken.... crazy Tracy and i just get the heineken and finished it! I've grow fatter!
11/16/2008 03:09:00 AM

Thu 13 Nov 08:
I dunno when i will collaps... i'm falling sic.. fever, cough, flu, giddy and bad headache.. has been taking panadol for days...Yet i cant get to rest.. my time is fully book... even no book i also got no time to rest at all... Xmas card, SFR logo, Grandsalads name card, name tag, flyers, Vip Card... i wanna go sentosa! DAMMIT!!! someone dao me~~~ Urg!! so i think every outing we planned for this week will b cancelled... i dunnno him larrr~ TMD!!! If he wanna mia form my sight i also can;t do anything no matter how much i cherish him~ If not when i go drinking i wont call and let u know blah blah blah~ Why am i upset and care so much abt how he feels? URG! stupid me!


11/14/2008 12:57:00 AM

Wed 12 Nov 08:
WTF! dunno wad happened lately...so unlucky... After drinking, that day i was like on some kind of curse.... i'm freaking emo!! Luckily i got a job with alot nice, pretty/handsome customers... Not forgetting her, my boss too.. I'm going to change to part time on the begining of Jan... While i'm washing dishes, i drop my phone in the basin and my phone was swimming in the water(OMG!)... I know everyone will say that i'm reaking dumb, clumsy & stupid! i just wanna play my own music that all!! So that's how my pinky died... But nvm i'll get her to repair... So now i'm using my new SE T303 phone.. haven start using DROP ON THE FLOOR ALREADY!! (DAMMIT!)
After work, it tooks me an hr to reached home... i walked like snail... so emo till nearly cried out~ Thinking about rubbish again... I'm 22 and there's 3 guys i regret knowing... K******, X******* & T******!!! 2 guys i regret letting them go but i got no choice... GY & QW!
They are nice guy i've ever met in my life! I even feel that they will b the 1 living with me for the rest of my life~~ But who knows? If not i left GY i wont know QW... If i dunno QW i dunno how sweet, cruel, unfair, hurts love can be.... Another things to make me regret is... Able to live till this age!
when reached amk i wished that it will rain heavily so i can walk in the rain and get home wet... Wished the heavier the better but i think worst than my shower...TMD! 11/13/2008 01:02:00 AM

The vodka Qing brought and always can't bear to open it!

and finally i open it!

11/11/2008 12:43:00 AM

I'm freaking emo and upset... cos of some guys larrr! i really dunno wad they r thinking! Anyway back to my emo part... who will love a girl who is a drinker? Even if she fall for him, i dun think is possible... sometimes, things is beyonds our control just like love.... URGGG! pls pls pls god pls dun let me hav the feeling take that off! i dun need it anyway~ I guess Qing will ignore me from today onwards.... always got drunk and something like this will happened~ Urg! it's my fault anyway can't blame anyone... I'm sorry Qing! i know it's pointless... But i guess the decision u made will b best for us ba! Since i'm no longer that sillygirl...
I'm gonna work hard and try to numb myself... Hopefully the feeling will fade away soon~ the person that moved my heart, i dun think he will like me anyway~ HA!
Another things is i just dunno wad happened to jin larrr! he behaving so weird! He made me upset for 2 days sia! Erm~ i guess i hav to keep a distance le larr too close le i scare i give him some wrong impression~ Mayb i'm better to be alone.. won't hurts anyone... shd i?

Gonna be busy for
*SFR logo
*Xmas cards
*work
*sleep
Things i'll try to kick away
*drinking!

每次我總 一個人走
交叉路口 自己生活
這次你卻說帶我走 某個角落 就你和我
像土壤抓緊花的迷惑 像天空纏綿雨的洶湧
在你的身後 計算的步伐每個背影每個場景
都有發過的夢

帶我走 到遙遠的以後
帶走我 一個人自轉的寂寞
帶我走 就算我的愛 你的自由 都將成為泡沫
我不怕 帶我走

每次我總獨自遠走
保持沉默 不皺眉頭
這次你卻說一起走
如此溫柔 從此以後
像土壤抓緊花的迷惑 像天空纏綿雨的洶湧
在你的身後 計算的步伐每個背影每個場景
都有發過的夢

帶我走 到遙遠的以後
帶走我 一個人自轉的寂寞
帶我走 就算我的愛 你的自由 都將成為泡沫
我不怕 帶我走

白茫留過漆黑盡頭
潮汐襲來浪花顫動
停在海岸結成了沫 哦～
成爲朝向草原其中
又在傳來一滴彩虹
刻在心中拍打著脈搏

帶我走 到遙遠的以後
帶走我 一個人自轉的寂寞
帶我走 就算我的愛 你的自由 都將成為泡沫
我不怕 帶我走

帶我走 就算我的愛 你的自由 都將成為泡沫
帶我走～ 11/10/2008 01:33:00 AM

Erdinger black, wine, water!

flowers from him

It cheer up my day!

11/09/2008 08:10:00 AM

Fri 7 Nov 08:
after so many days, i guess he haven forgotten abt me again le... Nvm i'll get by someday~ I've been thinking alot recently~ too many troubles... Thx jin to accompany me rushed up and down around orchard to find my pajamas, x-mas card drawing material~ Tml gonna meet him & jon for dinner weee! Can't wait for it! PizzaHut i'm coming~ Hmm!~ Wasn't happy today due to work.... and i couldn't buy everything i wans to get~ Like the markers/papers for the xmas card, my pajamas! SOB! Unlucky day!!! 11/08/2008 01:30:00 AM

To someone i care:
I can read ur stress, grief, sorrows & miserable stories behind ur smile... You always smiling to hide everything! i'm sucks in consoling others... dun say others i can't even handle with my own emotions... mayb u already used to cover ur grief with ur smile? Let ppl sees that u are doing fine? But to me i feel that you r not! i wish i know how to make ppl smile like u did~ But i can't!!! That is something i'll nv learn for the rest of my life.. Cos i dunno how to hide my grief & tears well! If you really need someone to talk to that u feel secure and trust... i hope i can be the one! i hope i'm able let you feel better! i'll promise to give the best shot!! Cos u didn't know how special you are to me..... Another special friend of mine! *i know i'm stupid cos you dun even know that i hav blog or you will take a look at this msg! But i just wanna write down the feeling i hav in heart before i forget!*

I just wanna make sure that all my friends are happy! Let me carry all the unwanted feelings and emotions... That's y i'm known as RUBBISH!! hurhur!~ 11/06/2008 12:32:00 AM

All of my monsters... He caught everything except scrumb!

11/04/2008 11:29:00 PM

Sun 2 Nov 08:
No work doesn;t mean i can slp late... Wake up at 9.45am go down uncle's factory to help him setter somethings.... then go CCK to help another guy on his house... Then stay at CCK till 2.30pm, uncle drove us home... Then i'm able to slp... i continue slp till 8pm! gonna meet him later~ i'll update some other time then!






11/02/2008 08:43:00 PM

WTF! i'm so tired! work whole day... after the peak hr, i've been working alone... didn't even take my lunch... bladder almost burst! tons and tons of rubbish to wash and clean... But sweet things is... after work, there someone sweet came to fetch me... and take me for a ride on 3 different cars within a hr!! WOW! tot that car really pretty BUT, not the type of car i wan~ hahaha~ was really happy to chat with him and he'll drove me around... Then he escort me home! HAHAHAH~ Tml another tiring day! 11/01/2008 12:28:00 AM