Had steamboat with my family and My pig~
Then we went to sis house play some game and have some fun....
Was angry that he dun looks like have the interest in the game..
Playing aimlessly...
Then we drink alot, while playing our last game
call knocking the cups..

When we went home..
i couldn't sleep...
Talked to baby alot about him~
Cried and so on...
I think i'm drunk at that time..
cause when i wake up this morning,
i couldn't rmb alot of things~
Like wad i've told him and stuff~

The only way to numb my pain was to KOed!
Today piggy unable accompany me.
His mom called him home...
Have been sometime he didn't help me much with my house chores~

I'm ending here i guess.
And i wont be updating for some time too~
Until i've heal myself!
2/28/2010 04:19:00 PM

Felt like drinking...
Whenever i wanting to drink, Baby knew something's troubling me.

I also dunno why i feels so emotional.
My heart feels so heavy, weird and jealousy?!
I'm really lost at this time. As i tried so hard, so far.
But when i met this obstacle,
i dunno how to manage my feelings as well as my emotions.

If not because of my baby, i guess i'd fall badly again.
Just like what he mention.
I can say, i'll be the same torturing myself.
cause it's the best way to numb myself.
Not letting the person inside me hurts..
This is the only method i could do to protect the person inside me.
What i can say is the real me mayb not judge by my appearances.
I know more clearly than anyone else.
that this person i'm hiding inside me is far more fragile.
She's once hurts very badly and unable to stand up again.
But with her family and the encouragement, she make it again.
Luckily, now i'm having my baby with me.
I'm already at my limit. I'm about to collapse.
But with him around i need not worry~
Cause he'd held me up tightly when i fall~

The feeling i'm having now is not as bad as my baby~
cause, all along he's trying to protect me from anything.
unwilling to see his precious behaving this way.
Also he loved me so much,
yet i still can't let go abt the history that guy left for me~

My baby is stronger more than i expect...
that's how he's able to be able hold on to me this far...



2/27/2010 12:09:00 AM

A romantic songs i falling with~~~~~
here's the lyric...

When a day is said and done,
In the middle of the night and your fast asleep, my love.
Stay awake looking at your beauty,
telling myself Im the luckiest man alive
Cause so many times I was certain you was gonna walk out of my life (life)
Why you take such a hold of me girl
when Im still trying to get my act right.

What is the reason, when you really could have any man you want,
I dont see, what I have to offer.
I shouldnt be in season, guess you could see I had potential.
Do you know your my miracle?

Im like a statue, stuck staring right at you,
Got me frozen in my tracks.
So amazed how you take me back,
Each and everytime our love collapsed
Statue, stuck staring right at you,
So when Im lost for words,
Everytime i disappoint you,
Its just cause I cant believe,
That youre so beautiful. (Stuck like a statue)
Dont wanna lose you, no. (Stuck like a statue)

Ask myself why is you even with me,
After all the shit I put you through,
Why did you make your heart song wit me
Its like youre living in an igloo
But baby your love is so warm it makes my shield melt down (down),
And everytime were both at war,
You make me come around.

What is the reason, when you really could have any man you want
I dont see, what I have to offer for.
I shouldnt be in season,guess you could see I had potential.
Do you know your my miracle?

Im like a statue, stuck staring right at you,
Got me frozen in my tracks.
So amazed how you take me back,
Each and everytime our love collapsed.
Statue, stuck staring right at you,
So when Im lost for words,
Everytime i disappoint you,
Its just cause I cant believe,
That youre so beautiful. (Stuck like a statue)
Dont wanna lose you, no. (Stuck like a statue)
And youre so beautiful. (Stuck like a statue)
Dont wanna lose you, never. (Stuck like a statue)

Every single day of my life I thank my lucky stars,
God really had to spend extra time, when he sculptured your heart.
Cause theres no explanation,cant solve the equation
Its like you love me more than I love myself.

Im like a statue, stuck staring right at you,
Got me frozen in my tracks.
So amazed how you take me back,
Each and everytime our love collapsed.
Statue, stuck staring right at you,
So when Im lost for words,
everytime i disappoint you
Its just cause I cant believe,
That youre so beautiful. (You are the reason,)
Stuck like a statue. (The reason for living,)
Dont wanna lose you, no. (The reason for breathing)
Stuck like a statue. (Youre so beautiful)
And youre so beautiful. (And I want you to feel it)
Stuck like a statue. (Cause so bad Im needing)
Dont wanna lose you, no. (Youre the reason for breathing)
Stuck like a statue. (Youre so beautiful)

When a day is said and done,
And in the middle of the night youre fast asleep, my love...

Im the luckiest man alive
2/25/2010 07:57:00 PM

Wasn't able rest properly last night~
Had a nightmare..
It was about that r/s i used to have.
Everything re-flashed in my dreams.

From how i know him to how we broke off.
How i've torture myself throughout the most painful journey of that relationship.
and seeing other girls in his arms.
My tears starts to flow down from my cheek.

When i woke up, my face was covered with tears,
My pillow was wet too.
My mind went empty....
And started to call baby~

Around 10am,
i get myself ready for school.
In my mind, it's keep replaying the heart breaking stories.
Suddenly i think of my baby!~
He waited for a girl he used to love.
Always be there for her no matter wad.
Until he met me.
At that time i still dunno about the feelings he had for me.
I rmb once, we had a gathering in a pub.
Whereas "He" also tag along.
At that time i was drunk.
I was so happy that he went and i kept hugging and kissing him.
But i didn't know that behind that scene, there's a silly pig   
trying to protect me.At the same time he felt jealousy and heartbreak.
When that silly pig left the pub,
he vent out his anger by kicking umbrella and got scolding from a security.
Yet no one knows the reason why he did that.
Hee! I'm the 1st to find out =P

From this, i know how much my baby suffered.
Than showing to anyone.
Yet always be there as well as protect his love ones secretly,
He's like a little hero of mine!~
And stopped me from replaying the nightmare.
That's how he melts my day =D








2/25/2010 06:36:00 PM

Photos again! =D

2/19/2010 10:54:00 PM

Was supposed to meet him today..
But gotta do the stupid god stuff..
So was cancelled...
I was really down, cause we dun really hav enough time to b tgt.
Realize that everything start drifting apart!
I dunno why... And i know he's puting alot effort..
I just can't feel the love..
Why is that so? Wad's in between us?
I dunno why i'm so tired easily.
I know he's also feeling tired already!
Now i know, how powerful
The society, surrounding, financial is.
It can ruin a relationship infact everything.
No matter how strong the love is,
can barely match with that.

I was so angry and throw trumpet..
Not even wanna eat.. Curse and swear to the god..
Asked them take back my life...
As i dun really get wad i wanted....
Am i really that greedy?
That's y i unable get anything i wan in life.
It's s useless, worthless life!
I hate everything, every single part of my life!
Simply sucks to core...
Just take it back!
i dun need it anyway. i think i'd b happier to b a ghost.
wandering anywhere i want!
Just take back Fuc*king heart!
AND RETURN ME MY FREEDOM!!



2/17/2010 11:37:00 PM

LOL~ Photos time!











2/15/2010 04:41:00 PM

Saddddd! Wont get to read his blog today!
I simply hate Chinese new year.
Cause it's damn bored, boring and STUPID!

Maybe i'm tired of putting of a mask infront of my family~
Relative who i not really close with...
Especially my cousins!
It seems like we are criticize each other.
I only feel comfortable with my Grandma, youngest uncle, 3rd uncle and his family, youngest aunty!
Next year! i definitely wanna run away after all those red packet.
However this year not much red packet.
I dun even hav to mood to celebrate CNY!
Didn't even have to mood to doll myself up.

As well as mood-less to wish my uncles and aunties~

Lastly,
I feel so empty without him =(
Faster come back from M'sia~
After this CNY! i wanna get my hair rebond as well as do pedicure!

2/14/2010 11:41:00 PM

Dunno why i got no mood for Chinese new year!
I was kinda pissed off with every little things~

Dun feel like dolling up tml.
I didn't even buy any new year clothes...
Haven even pack my room.
When my house is ready for CNY.
Only mine is still messy!!!

Ytd went to Midori @ velocity to had my hair cut!
Over all was not bad.
Finally i'm able to cut the hair style i wanted.
Looked so Japanese. But with my face, CUIed!
However i still love this hairstyle.
I'll shall go back there to hav my hair cut now and then.

For now, i wanna chill! Night everyone.
And Happy CNY!
2/13/2010 11:32:00 PM

Heee! I'm lazy blog today~
But my photos will tell you how much i'm enjoying =)

Cards i've done!

2/13/2010 12:57:00 AM